Reflections on April 29th, 2010 – on the darker side

Today’s aspects brought up the darker side of the Gemini energy with the Moon traversing Scorpio in the background and lovely Venus engaging in a quincunx to it’s ruler Pluto, retrograde in Capricorn, additionally tainted by Juno in Gemini’s semi-square to the goddess of discord, Eris in Aries. Thus, we may have been tempted and tested by a strife-seeking mentality that responded to thoughts from the realm of the shadow Self and adjusted our approach accordingly.

A knife-wielding man attacked a kindergarten class of 4-year-olds in eastern China, slashing 28 children in what an expert said was a copycat rampage of two other episodes at Chinese schools in the past month. – This mad man adopted the approach (Gemini) used by other ‘dark forces’ (Pluto/Eris) to commit an unspeakable act of gruelty (Venus-Juno in Gemini in dynamic tension to Pluto/Eris).

Arizona’s sweeping immigration bill allows police to arrest illegal immigrant day laborers seeking work on the street or anyone trying to hire them. It won’t take effect until summer but it is already having an effect on the state’s underground economy. The law’s supporters hope the departure of illegal immigrants will help dismantle part of the underground economy in Arizona and create jobs for thousands of legal residents in a state with a 9.6 percent unemployment rate. Losing hundreds of thousands of unskilled laborers wouldn’t hurt the state’s economy in the short term, but it could limit the economy’s ability to grow once it recovers, says Marshall Vest, director of the Economic and Business Research Center at the University of Arizona’s Eller College of Management. – In this case, a definitive decision (waxing semi-square) has been made to get rid of illegal immigrants (Pluto), chosing force as the means to reach this end (Juno-Eris, Venus-Pluto) with the goal to dismantle part of the underground economy (Pluto Rx in Capricorn), while at the same time creating jobs for legal residents (the duality of the Gemini energy). However, the outcome of this plan/law could go both ways.

A new leak was discovered in the pipes a mile below the ocean’s surface. Five times more oil a day than previously believed is spewing into the Gulf of Mexico from a blown-out well of a sunken drilling rig, an estimate the oil company trying to contain the massive spill disputed at first. Meanwhile, the President and Homeland Security are stepping up efforts to help contain the spill that threatens the country’s most fertile seafood grounds and wildlife area. – This is a dark day in our history, indeed. It happens at a time when the U.S. government considers to open more areas for offshore drilling (a Mercury Rx effect – ruling over the Gemini energies – that shows us both sides of the coin too). In my opinion has Pluto rulership over oil, or black gold, because it’s a natural resource harvested from underground and Pluto rules the riches found underground.

Tarot card of the day is “Justice“, which emphasizes to look at both sides of an issue. However, this card can also be read as “fate” or the law of karma at work as in cause and effect. For J it signified a ‘win’ (Eris), because he heard from the accountant today that he will actually get tax money (Pluto-Venus) back – sweet justice. 🙂

Scorpio Full Moon – April 28th, 2010

The Moon ingressed Scorpio on the 27th at 06:28 pm EDT and was full at 08:18 am EDT on the 28th. This culmination in the Aries lunation cycle was accompanied by the inferior conjunction of the Sun and Mercury Rx in Taurus with both of them semi-square Jupiter in Pisces. Thus, this particular lunation cycle climaxed in a seed moment, impressed with a new quality of will, purpose and mental energy related to our emotional security needs as we’re undergoing a times of crisis after having experienced a loss of faith in one way or another. With the opposition of the Sun and Moon the moment has come to confront our demons and to rebuild our life. As yet unknown factors reveal themselves in new potentialities as promised by the forthcoming impulse of this lunation, enabling us to gain experience at another or altered level of being after an transforming, regenerative occurrence that had us questioning our beliefs. Like the phoenix rising from the ashes can we opt for cyclic renewal and repair the damage, starting by making a decision as an outcome of introspection and rethinking and then setting a course. Ceres stations retrograde at 04:38 Capricorn, which initiates a phase of strengthening our inner support structure and taking care of ‘inner work’. Venus in Gemini’s quincunx to Ceres Rx demands an adjustment in our approach in form of resoluteness in order to commit to the goal we’ve established in this context.

The Sabian Symbol for the Moon at 08:06 Scorpio states:

“A dentist at work. Keynote: Overcoming the negative results of social practices and ego cravings – INVENTIVENESS.”

For the Sun at 08:06 Taurus it states:

“A fully decorated Christmas tree. Keynote: The ability to create inner happiness in dark hours – FAITH IN CYCLIC RENEWAL.”

(Dane Rudhyar, “An Astrological Mandala: The Cycle of Transformations and Its 360 Symbolic Phases”, Pages 197 and 76, respectively)

Sandra Bullock filed for divorce and revealed the couple’s adopted son she wants to raise as a single parent. A decision has been made, a course has been set; cyclic renewal is imminent. She is firm, taking responsibility and is willing to create inner happiness after a fresh start.

Former First Lady Laura Bush opens up in her new book about the fatal car crash she caused in her youth. She indicates in this book that she lost her faith after this accident and has been dealing with it by ignoring it (Jupiter in Pisces). Finally is she ready to put this chapter of her life behind her and to take a stand, do the responsible thing and confront her failures.

In the Goldman Sachs hearings the clashes between lawmakers and lower level executives have intensified with the latter desperately trying to fend off the accusations. Will they finally admit their fault and deceptive business politics?

A decision has been made in regard to the oil leak from the damaged rig. The Coast Guard wants to burn off the spilled oil, because the containing effort would take three months time. Another environmental disaster (Ceres in Capricorn) that just ‘begs’ for cyclic renewal. Let’s hope it’s the right decision.

Tarot card of the day is the “Ace of Swords reversed“, which indicates the ability to see both sides of a situation. However, there’s a chance that one will expend a lot of energy and actually achieve nothing.

Yesterday, we’ve been to the Home&Hardware Store, where J purchased a few things for the basement renovations he started today. He’s finally getting this last corner down there done. This, however, has been a setback for me in regard to my blogging. I’ve been adjusting to his plans and agenda so that my chores around the house accumulated, leaving me ‘with the bulk of work’ to take care of this morning.

Reflections on April 26th, 2010 – the world beyond our own

In addition to the much talked about Saturn-Uranus opposition, the last one in mutable signs, did Juno in Gemini cast a quincunx to Pluto Rx in Capricorn. Thus, we could have felt the pressure to move on with a project and looked into alternatives in order to make some progress in the near future, while we may have succumbed to the fact that we’re dealing with forces beyond our control and therefore had to sit still, patiently awaiting the ‘turning of the tides’.

Violent storms did at least kill 12 people in the U.S. where ferocious tornadoes hit 3 states. – These forces beyond our control had people ‘sitting out’ the dangerous weather.

A homeless good Samaritan was left to die on a sidewalk with people walking by and doing nothing after he had intervened in a fight to help a woman. – The shame of these people is memorized forever on a videocamera. In this case, the dual nature of the sign Gemini is once more revealed as one man makes a difference (Saturn-Uranus) to save this woman, while others (Juno in Gemini) walk by and let him die (quincunx to Pluto Rx). It provides furthermore insight into our individual natures (Uranus) and the things we stand for or position we take (Saturn).

Tarot card of the day was “The World“, which fell out of the deck in a position I can only describe as “half reversed”. So, this would imply that the end of a cycle has been reached, but might be delayed. There might be a sense of hesitancy or avoidance regarding the conclusion. However, change is inevitable.

We’ve been sitting on our deck yesterday afternoon – me wanting to start a knitting project and J wanting to complete the basement. But since his tax assessment (Pluto) hasn’t been completed yet, he’s been hesitant to move forward. Whereas I didn’t understand the instruction of the pattern and then I couldn’t find the end of the thread and thus had to roll the yarn up starting with the other end, which left me with a complete mess I have to untangle.(: From the doctor we didn’t hear either.

Pisces lunation review

The Pisces New Moon on March 15^th was conjunct Mercury and Uranus with the lunation falling into my 7^th and the Mercury-Uranus conjunction into my 8^th house. So, one could say it straddled the cusp of my 8^th house, the area related to shared values and resources, such as revenue, debts, credits, insurance etc. It’s also the house of the subconscious and other things that got buried away, of surrender, intimacy, transformation and therapy. Moreover, the lunation made aspect contact with my chart by forming a t-square with my natal nodal axis in Gemini/Sagittarius across the parental houses 10/4. As could’ve been expected from a challenging setup like that, several important themes have been triggered, all of which involve issues of mobility and communication as well as the mental processes underlying them. A crossroads in the line of destiny has now been reached in this regard and the time has come to make a turn, especially as Mars in Virgo has also progressed into a t-square with this axis by secondary progression. Thus, a mutable grand cross has actually been configured, pressuring from all of its ends for cohesive, coordinated action.

According to the Sabian Symbol for this lunation would “different people realize that they had to go on with their different projects”, a pretty revealing statement in this context. Because the lunation fell for J into his 3^rd house, opposite his natal Pluto in Virgo in 9, it was the ‘car business’ that would preoccupy his mind and where he would make changes (Mercury-Uranus conjunction) to tie up loose ends (conjunct Pisces New Moon) – whether this concerned his small company (Germania Motorsport) or the SUV we had parked in our driveway. That this wouldn’t sit well with me was indicated by Juno in Taurus’s semi-square to this cluster of planets. He was also busy filing our tax returns, which factored greatly into his decision-making process as did the power struggles he became engaged in during this time with his business partners and the company politics that cost him the last nerve, so to speak (NM opposite Pluto). Therefore, as the pressure intensified he threatened that he would quit his job and pull out of his business, stating that he’s ready to give up and lose everything (Pisces).

Since I know him well, this wasn’t something I hadn’t heard before from him (semi-square from Juno in Taurus) and particularly over the course of the last year did I learn that my emotional involvement in these situations has only harmed me so far and that I cannot control which direction the developments will take us, even less control him. His tax assessment has been always a matter of concern, which of course goes back to his spending habits and general attitude toward money, and thus quite predictably will lead to the same scenario every year. By now I’m not surprised anymore that he will come up then with certain schemes I find shocking, but this is only, because his personality is so different from mine. It’s a time in the year when I braze myself for the inevitable trials ‘inflicted upon me’, which may have actually aided me in those other instances of the confrontational kind I experienced, the first of which I did encounter on the day of the First Quarter Moon, March 23^rd, when I had finally decided to make this outstanding call to the dental office, where I had a filling done back in December, but was still experiencing problems with that particular tooth.

This “crisis in action” had the waxing Cancer Moon square the Aries Sun (from house 10 to house 8 for me – public dealings) accompanied by Mercury in Aries’ semi-square to Neptune in Aquarius. It was not only a sensitive issue, but also a source of anger and disappointment, quite understandably, after all I’ve been through and had to pay for, literally and figuratively. But there was a chance of some form of compensation for me in this and that was the main reason why I pursued the matter from this angle, instead of having it done by the other dentist. This was a wrong assessment, however, I wasn’t aware of at that time in the same sense as the information and advice given to me wasn’t that reliable either. Nonetheless, it was all part of the lesson I’ve been taught. After a rather desperate search I finally found the number of this dentist and dialed the office and since I was pretty upset what the circumstances of this situation concerned, it wasn’t that hard to use a direct approach. The receptionist listened and seemed to be reasonable; to a certain point though, which was when I tried to explain my case to her in its entirety. I realized the futility of my efforts, especially by using the phone as a medium, and stopped right there with my complaints. With the intention in mind to address this properly once I’d be there, facing them person-to-person, I set an appointment.

Only a couple of days later did the circumstances force me to make another call – this time to the power company that had sent us a final notice of payment for a bill we had actually overpaid and this in time. The person who answered this call was not only incompetent, but also ignorant, unfriendly and short. In spite of my anger about this matter was I reasonable enough to not set myself on par with her and remained composed and objective. However, I wasn’t content with the outcome of this call either.

Then came the Libra Full Moon (falling into houses 2 and 8 for me) and with it transiting Neptune in square position to my natal IC/MC axis. A major water pipeline broke in our area that was a further example of incompetence and ignorance gone wrong. J had forewarned me of a possible shortage, but both of us didn’t listen to our instincts and flushed the saved water out after their announcement that they had rectified the damage and that the water flow was now intact. This left me without water during the day hours of the next day (interestingly enough the Sabian Symbol for the Libra Full Moon spoke of “a canoe reaching calm water” – the water flow had been calmed for us!).

A few days later, when Mercury in Aries formed a sextile to Chiron in Aquarius, did our SUV break down on J’s way home from work, where he had left early to be able to take me to my dental appointment. Thus, he had to park the SUV in the garage and drive the truck instead. On our way to the dentist did he reveal his plans for the SUV to me, which caused me even more stress than all his aggravation after the incident, because this meant a setback to me as it would leave me without a vehicle again. Not to mention that I liked the idea of driving this car. So, when we arrived at the dentist’s office I was mentally exhausted already from the shocking realizations and crushing of my hopes I had just went through and therefore I wasn’t really in my best shape (mentally) anymore for the confrontation and this was one of the reasons why I was unsuccessful. I didn’t get my point across – not just because the dentist was defensive and started arguing (he didn’t just simply accept my accusations – imagine that!) – but because I failed to address it in an unmistakable way once he was on the defensive (which actually means that I gave in or is it ‘caved in’?), which is mostly based on my experiences with J and his mom (they’re very much alike – he has a partile Mercury –Moon opposition from Aquarius to Leo across houses 2 and 8 with the Moon also ruling 8 and Saturn ruling 2), who have been my only real contacts for a very long time as well as my line of support, so to speak, and who take every argument or difference in viewpoint as a personal offense and turn it around as they see fit or change the topic of the conversation in the blink of an eye, which makes it impossible to talk something out, especially while they’re trying to shut me up and to impose their will or opinion upon me. Conclusively, what happened at the dentist’s was the reenactment of a pattern and as long as I can’t handle this in my private life (see Aquarius lunation review) I will also not be able to succeed in my public life.  

On the next day began the Easter weekend, the time of resurrection (though only after crucifixion I might add – Sun semi-square Neptune and Pallas-Vesta square perfection). The ache that had started in my left hand had now taken over the entire arm (Mercury). J had to send Adrian to the walk-in-clinic with me, because he couldn’t leave at work (transiting Uranus was now in contact with my natal IC/MC axis). My overall condition only got worse since then, causing me to face my mortality. It seemed as though my prayers during the darkest hours had been heard as I fell seriously ill with a disease that hasn’t been identified yet (transiting Neptune is currently sitting on my natal Saturn in Aquarius in house 6) and which I might have been carrying for a long time as one might suspect after all what has been going on, ignoring the signs in the face of my own powerlessness (the death wish, so to speak) regarding my personal circumstances and a position of ‘immovability’ where I have lost my independence almost entirely and my values and needs had been given no voice or were completely overseen in the context of shared values. I certainly got the attention now, though the prognosis is dire.   

Anyway, Mercury in Taurus was trine a stationary Pluto in Capricorn on the day of the Third Quarter Moon with the waning Moon in Capricorn squaring off the Sun in Aries (from house 5 to house 8 for me) when my daughter (5^th house connection) took possession of the SUV in form of a lease (8^th house connection) J had arranged for and that he said was intended to pay off the debts he had put in my name, which is exactly the point that drove me over the edge, because I’ve got to know his habits and thus I know how trustworthy he is when it comes to finances. Although I didn’t feel any resentment toward her (Pluto), I experienced an emotional breakdown, descending in a hell of my own making (5^th-8^thconnection) and behaved in a mean-spirited way toward J. This was the “psychic release” announced by the keynote of the Sabian Symbol for the Moon, the “crisis in consciousness” that had me blowing off the steam (Mercury in Taurus trine Pluto in Capricorn). Fortunately, I stopped short at the cancellation of our planned theatre visit (it was a trine after all), which happened at the time of the Mars-Pluto quincunx and signified a remarkable adjustment for both of us. At the end of this lunation cycle were we able to overcome our differences as we engaged in a joint activity. The ‘dark’ prospects brought us closer together.

Reflections on April 24th and 25th, 2010 – the weekend

On Saturday cast Venus in Taurus a trine to Saturn Rx in Virgo and the Taurean Sun another one to Ceres in Capricorn. Therefore, some unfinished business got finally taken care of; a repair-related task, corrective, touching-up step and a matter of support saw completion or was brought to an end.

A British man lived with the corpse of his dead roommate rotting under a couch for 10 years. Dennis Pring is believed to have died while drinking on his sofa in 1998 but his fully-clothed skeleton was not found until his roommate Alan Derrick was evicted from their apartment in Bristol, northern England last year, a coronial inquest has heard. A corpse was finally laid to rest. It is inconceivable to me how this man could have lived with a rotten corpse under his couch for such a long time.

Michelle took me to my last dental appointment (Venus trine Saturn Rx). She had the kids in tow (Sun trine Ceres), because Adrian and J were doing some repairs in Mom’s house (Sun trine Ceres). They installed a closet in the wall (Saturn) of her guest bedroom, tiled the last stretch in the kitchen (Ceres) and provided her with soil and a pergola for her garden (Venus and Taurus energies). J brought the antique chaise lounge and chair set back she has no space for. Now, it’s taken up the space in our living room, but it’s nice to have it. 🙂

Tarot card of the day was the “8 of Pentacles reversed”, which had to be interpreted in the context of those ‘finishing touches’ undertaken. For instance, the dentist finally fixed the right tooth, the one that had been aching before the cleaning procedure even started (after he had fixed the wrong one last time). In the afternoon, I completed a text I had been putting on the backburner for the last couple of weeks. The work J and Adrian did for Mom were either things they hadn’t completed yet or the last step in a process.

this is an image of completion by germansinmexico

However, what Sunday concerns, Venus ingressed Gemini and this shifted the energy for me in a way that had me on the move and enjoying myself, though only after I had overcome a mood swing in the morning with Venus’ square to Chiron and Mercury’s square to Mars; the latter got me literally out of the house and on the road! As Juno in Gemini made also a quincunx to Ceres in Capricorn in addition to the Taurean Sun’s trine to Pluto Rx in Capricorn, the adjustment involved the principle of relating and turned this into a day of indulging our senses. First we went to Rona (home and hardware store) to get some ideas for the intended renovations/completion of the basement and then we stopped at Remark, where we ‘stocked up’ on sushi. They’ve got the best in the whole area. We’ve rented a couple of movies – one of them was “The Lovely Bones”, which is a sad story as a young girl gets murdered by a neighbor, who’s actually a serial killer. Still, the story is beautifully portrayed, especially her experience of the afterlife in a zone between the earth plane and what we call heaven. She’s holding onto her feelings, memories and the love of her family, intensifying their trials throughout this difficult time and until the murderer is exposed. When her desperate father gets almost beaten to death, she finally realizes that she has to let go and move on. Although the movie hasn’t the ending we would like to see, justice has still been served in one way or another and there is so much love underlying all their interactions and bondings and what ultimately holds them all together. After we had watched this movie the Moon had ingressed Libra and we went on another tour through the surroundings, where I took many pictures of the countryside and the Ausable River. I haven’t uploaded them yet and I didn’t draw a Tarot card; neither did I follow the news. It was just a nice, lazy day for us – a feast for our senses with some ‘dark’ undertones. At night we watched the other movie, fittingly called “Dark Matter”, about a bright and brilliant Chinese student in the U.S., who couldn’t deal with the rejection he experienced after the release of a new theory about cosmology and dark matter that cost him his academic career. He shot the people he deemed responsible and then ended his own life. The planetary Archetypes making up the energy-weather of the day were well represented in both movies, showing the light, lovely side of relationships (enjoyment) and also the dark, hidden nature we carry within us (Gemini energy and Sun-Pluto).

this is an image of dark matter by Bao0o